Jealousy is such a tricky thing. The dark power it possesses can put you on the worst type of negative life spiral. So, how do you make Jealousy work to your advantage?
I promise this won’t be fluffy advice that ends with you just putting on a fake smile. What I’m about to share will inspire you to be a better you, if you let it.
The Reality of Jealousy in Your life
We live in a world where Jealously is a more readily available option than years ago. When Social Media became a thing, I remember thinking about how cool it is going to be to see into the lives of all my friends and family that live hours away from us.
The reality is no one focuses on what our lives are really like. Whether it’s a conscious effort or not, we all paint a fake picture of our life on Social Media.
Before social media, when you were having a bad day, it was merely just that. Now, when you have a bad, day your negativity is blown out of proportion by all the “happy” posts of the rest of the world having a great day, right?
Listen, I’m not saying that Social Media is the Devil, or maybe I am? I’m just telling you no one needs to be kicked when they are down. & Social Media doesn’t care about your bad day at all.
My Jealousy Truth
We met at a Homeschool Co-Op. At first glance, she was everything I wasn’t.
My first thought was, “Man, SHE has her Shit together!” She didn’t have a hair out of place. Her outfit was just right, not too casual or fancy. All 4 (yes 4) of her kids were dressed neatly & had their hair done too. & if that wasn’t enough, she was smiling all the time. She also spoke with such peppy kindness; it made me question in my head if it was fake.
I got a note from her reminding me that Jade (my 8-year-old) needed to practice her solo for their upcoming performance.
“Oh, Crap!” I thought. Where the heck did I put the CD that she gave me 2 months ago?
Panic set in when I check the only spot I could think the CD was & it wasn’t there. Of course, my thoughts turned against me & I started to beat myself up mentally.
“Lisa, why didn’t you put that CD in a better Spot? You know how important this performance is to Jadey Baby.”
“Look, this just proves you are horrible at this homeschool thing.”
“& now Jade is going to suck at her solo & it’s all going to be all your fault.”
I decided the only thing I can do is to ask for a digital copy of the song & now this will confirm in her mind that I clearly suck at being a mom.
Oh Jeez! This has to be the WORST response EVER. She’s not even will to send me a digital copy. There is absolutely NO WAY she doesn’t think that I’m a tool of a mom.
Admitting the Truth
I had to respond, right? But what’s the “right” response?
At that moment, I decided to embrace who I was. The reality is I’m actually ok with being slightly disorganized & my family is ok with me.
Maybe the “right” choice is letting her know that “I’m ok with me too?”
I sat there in shock at how this situation turned out. Not only does she feel unorganized all the time, but she even passed along a digital copy as soon as she saw it.
Maybe I just need to get out of my own head. Perhaps I need to put more faith in believing the good in others.
What if YOU got out of your darn head & stopped looking at other moms as if they were doing a better job than you.
We are all on the same journey
Listen just because someone “appears” to have their shit together more than you doesn’t mean you have to be jealous. Chances are there’s something that you do better than them & your just not seeing it.
A long time ago, there was this typical guy name Cornelius. He was just doing the best he could in life. He heard that this other guy named Peter had some interesting things to say about living your best life. So, he invited him over for dinner.
When Peter arrived, Cornelius immediately felt inadequate & fell to his knees to “praise” Peter for all the amazing things Peter had done in his life.
Acts 10:26-But Peter lifted him up, saying, “Stand Up; I myself am also a man”
Peter was quick to point out they were equals in this life.
So, get out of your own darn head & realize it’s not about the things that you suck at. It’s about your journey & all moms are on the same journey.